Over the last few years my confidence was seriously shaken. My baby was born in Africa (away from home), a terror attack (four months later), multiple security threats, businesses lost in the terror attack, health issues due to stress, all the hobbies I LOVE to do seemed like a distant memory, two new businesses where I have felt like an amature getting started.

One day I woke up and thought “who is this incredibly weak and fragile human I am picking up off the floor daily?” It was me…

I didn’t feel like my OLD SELF at all (the girl in the picture traveling alone and working all over the world). What I have always known is that confidence is a muscle and it needs to be fueled, conditioned and trained. While I wasn’t looking, mine had atrophied — big time. I was away from everything that fed my personal power and confidence. I stopped the hobbies that I loved; surfing, skiing, hiking, communing with nature. My physical activity diminished because I was tired ALL. THE. TIME. I felt afraid ALL. THE. TIME — focusing on the security risks of being in Africa.

I compared myself to others who were way further ahead of me in their businesses and working 24/7 trying to catch up and feeling guilty for not spending quality time with my little girl. My single biggest priority is feeling like ME again (the confident energetic version).

I hired some amazing coaches to see for me what I was having trouble seeing for myself and laid out a deliberate plan to return to a “braver me.”

So here’s what I am doing now: I am doing things I love ALL. THE. TIME, I moved myself and my daughter out of the environment that was causing me so much anxiety and back home to California, I booked myself a solo trip and did my own life planning and introspecting. I am putting my physical and mental health above all else (because without that NOTHING else matters). I am focusing on the people I LOVE, not comparing myself to people I don’t know. I am making quality-time with my daughter non-negotiable (she is only 3 once), I am asking for help, coaching, guidance (and not doing everything alone).  I am putting myself in situations where at first I don’t feel comfortable and getting comfortable. I am taking a shitload of imperfect action (better done than perfect). I am taking self-imposed pressure off and knowing the things I want to happen will happen when they are supposed to. I have put back into perspective that LIFE is pointless if you are not enjoying the journey along the way.